What I’m Bringing Forward This Year
by Tash Brooks
I used to think a new year meant I had to become a whole new person. New routines. New body. New career. New attitude. Vision board, word of the year, twelve-step morning routine and 45 minute skin care routine.
This time, I do not want a brand new me. I want a truer me.
This last year stripped away a lot. Work, roles, relationships, illusions. Some of it I chose. Some of it I did not. There were moments I felt like my life had been taken to the studs. When that happens, it is very tempting to look at the next year as a renovation project. Fix it. Rebuild it. Cover it in fresh paint so no one sees the cracks. But when I look a little closer, I can see it. Even in the mess. I grew. In the middle of loss, I started making different choices. Quieter ones. Braver ones. Less about how things looked, more about how they feel in my body and my soul.
So as I stand at the edge of a new year, here is what I am bringing forward with me.
What I Am Bringing Forward Into The New Year
1. Self respect over self abandonment
This year taught me a hard truth. Every time I say yes when my whole body is begging me to say no, I am not being kind. I am abandoning myself. So what I am bringing with me is a different standard. If keeping the peace costs me my peace, it is too expensive.
I am bringing forward the moments I chose self respect this year. The call I ended when it turned unkind. The boundary I held. The invitation I declined even though I felt guilty. The quiet night in instead of one more performance of “I am fine.”
These did not look impressive from the outside. But inside, they were huge. I am not leaving that progress behind.
2. A smaller circle, but a safer one
This year took some people out of my life and brought others closer. The losses still sting. I still scroll sometimes and feel that old ache. But I cannot deny the truth. The connections that remained, and the new ones that arrived, are softer, truer, more mutual. I am bringing forward the friendships where I can show up messy. The people who do not need a polished version of my story to stay. The ones who text back “How is your heart” and then actually stay for the answer.
I am done chasing rooms that need me to shrink. The circle may be smaller, but the safety is bigger. Amen.
3. Permission to be in progress
This year knocked the perfection out of me. I did not follow the plan. I did not heal on a schedule. I did not magically arrive at some upgraded, always confident version of myself. I cried. I repeated old patterns. I learned. I repaired. I tried again. What I am bringing forward is the understanding that being in progress is not a flaw. It is a sign that I am alive and still growing.
I do not need to cross a finish line on January 1st. I need to keep taking honest steps in the direction of what feels aligned and kind and true.
4. The pause
This year I started practicing the pause.
The pause before reacting to the email.
The pause before saying yes.
The pause before spiraling into old stories about not being enough.
Pause, what a gift.
That tiny space between trigger and action saved me more than once.
I am bringing that with me.
A breath. A beat. A moment to ask, “What would self respect do here?” Instead of letting fear or ego run the show.
5. Grief and gratitude at the same table
There were days this year when my grief sat right beside my gratitude. I used to think I had to pick one. Either I was thankful and “fine” or I was sad and “negative.” What actually happened is that both pulled up a chair and sat beside one another.
I laughed and missed people at the same time.
I felt proud of myself and disappointed in someone else’s choices.
I loved parts of my life while grieving the parts that were gone.
I am bringing forward the permission to hold both. To let my life be layered and complicated without deciding that it means I am broken.
Writing Prompts: What Are You Bringing Forward?
These prompts are here to help you see what you are already carrying into the new year. Not what you wish you were, but what is actually here, already growing inside you.
You do not have to answer them all. Pick the ones that tug at you.
1. Name the quiet wins
What did I handle differently this year than I would have a few years ago?
Where did I surprise myself with my courage, honesty or tenderness?
What is one moment I felt quietly proud of myself, even if no one else noticed?
2. Self respect check
When did I choose self respect over people pleasing or self abandonment?
Is there a situation where I kept a boundary or told the truth, even though it felt scary?
What did that choice protect in me?
3. Relationships that feel like home
Who in my life feels like a safe place to land? What do they do that makes me feel that way?
Did any relationship become more honest this year, even if it went through a storm first?
What kind of connection do I want more of next year, based on what felt good and grounding this year?
4. Habits that actually helped
What did I do this year that genuinely supported my emotional or physical health?
Think small: walks, journaling, therapy, stretching, creative work, honest conversations.Which of those practices do I want to carry forward, even in a very simple form?
What is one habit I started or restarted that deserves more credit than I have given it?
5. Lessons from the hard things
Pick one hard situation from this year. What did it teach me about my values, my limits or my strength?
How did that experience shape what I will no longer tolerate going forward?
Is there a belief or standard I gained through that struggle that I want to protect in the new year?
6. The story I am rewriting
What old story about myself started to loosen its grip this year?
For example: “I have to be the strong one,” “I am too much,” “I do not belong,” “I always mess things up.”What new story do I want to bring into the new year instead? Write it as if it is already becoming true:
“I am learning to…,” “I am allowed to…,” “I am worthy of…”
7. Anchors for the year ahead
Looking back over my answers, what keeps showing up as important? Honesty, rest, better friendships, creativity, spiritual practice, boundaries, something else?
If I chose three words or themes to anchor me next year, based on what worked this year, what would they be?
What is one small way I can honor each of those themes in January?
A Closing Note to Yourself
You can end with this simple practice.
Write:
“Dear me, here is what I am bringing forward into the new year…”
List it. The big things and the tiny ones. The boundaries. The softness. The new standards. The people. The practices. The way you talk to yourself when you are hurting.
Then write:
“I refuse to leave these behind, because they are evidence of who I am becoming.”
You do not have to turn into a different person when the calendar changes. You are allowed to walk into the new year carrying every hard earned piece of wisdom and self respect you gathered in the last one.
That is the work. And you are already doing it.
I love you.
Happy New More of YOU Year.
Tash x